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“I Don’t Like It Here.”
Here’s the thing: when you go to see a scary movie in theater, you expect it to be, you know, scary. Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark certainly isn’t the worst movie I’ve ever seen in theater. But as a...
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“EMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILY!”
Splatterfest did not exactly go off without a hitch this year. There were sick cats to contend with, early morning work that could not be ignored, friends who didn’t show up, pizza places who failed to...
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“Suzy, What Do You Know About . . . Witches?”
Last week, I was a horror movie nut who had gone her whole life without seeing a Dario Argento film. No longer, my friends. No longer. DISCLAIMER: Images of gory, dead people, particularly in the...
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“Well, I Don’t See How A Thing Like Cricket Can Make You Forget Seeing People.”
For belated Thanksgiving, my family and I did the usual stuff — ate turkey, gave thanks, talked incessantly about my continued lack of a boyfriend — as well as more fun stuff, like watching old Alfred...
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“It Must Feel Like Your God Abandoned You.”
Just before I went to Clarion West last summer, a little movie called Prometheus came out. Some of my fellow classmates went to see this movie that first weekend, while I skipped out — I was tired and,...
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“While You Were Still Learning How to Spell Your Name, I Was Being Trained to...
All right, folks. The Day of Reckoning has come. Some of you may remember that I failed last year’s horror film challenge and, as a result, invited you to choose my punishment movie. You chose...
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“I Don’t Think You Understand. I Marched Against the NRA.”
You ever stick with something for so long that, even though it’s sucked for years, you feel compelled to continue with it until the bitter end, just to see how it all turns out? Yeah. Try to ignore...
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“That’s Not A Plan. That’s a Shit Sandwich Without Bread.”
Many years ago, I watched the original Red Dawn. I know I did. I actually remember sitting down to watch it. And yet . . . and yet it’s like the entire experience was wiped from my mind, like something...
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“You Know, You’re the Second Guy I’ve Met Today That Seems to Think a Gat in...
I’m really interested in film noir, but I haven’t actually watched very many of the classics yet. I’m much more familiar with modern noir – Brick, LA Confidential, Chinatown, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, etc....
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“Well, What Does She Expect? You Leave Your Navigator Lying Around, Naturally...
Sometimes, when I’m not around to entertain her with my sheer awesomeness, Mekaela watches movies without me. These are usually movies I have little to no interest in, and if they end up being...
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“I Now Pronounce You Devil and His Shorty.”
A few weeks ago, my friends and I were faced with a hard choice. We had all gathered to watch a movie together, and the final nominees were this: Frozen, a highly beloved Academy Award winning Disney...
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“I Want You To Be Honest With Me. Absolutely and Completely Honest. Have You...
Tell me the truth: have you been missing my Teen Wolf season recaps? Hush, of course you have. Well, lucky for you, I have another one right here ready to read. Season 4 is the first season I’ve been...
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“Wow, You’re a Winner, Ain’t Ya?”
Halloween is my favorite holiday of the year. You get to dress up in fun costumes, have an excuse to eat junk food that you were going to eat anyway, and watch a bunch of scary movies. Also, it’s not a...
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“I Am Turning Thirty Next Week, and I Just Want to Go Home and Grow Oranges!”
A few months ago, I went to San Francisco. I don’t make it out to SF all that much, primarily because I don’t have a car and it’s a long damn bus ride. But when I do go, I usually try to get in a trip...
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“Tell Me, Do You Bleed? You Will.”
Well. I did it. I FINALLY saw Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice. It’s not the worst thing I’ve ever seen. But my God, is it a hot mess. SUMMARY: 18 months after the events of Man of Steel, the world...
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“Cars Can’t Fly, Dom! Cars Can’t Fly!”
Well, I reviewed Fast and Furious 6. Might as well review Furious 7. When it comes to one-upping the previous movie on completely ludicrous stunts . . . this is a “hold my beer” franchise, isn’t it?...
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“Bulletproof. Blind Ninja. Whatever It Is You Are.”
So, I haven’t been here as regularly as I’d like to, and unfortunately that’s probably not gonna change anytime in the near future. I have Novel Writing Deadlines to meet, which means I’m instituting a...
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World’s Worst Trekkie: Carlie Takes On “Court Martial”
Well, now that Halloween is over–sob–is it time to get back to Star Trek? In this episode, Kirk is on trial for murder! I wonder what the verdict will be. DISCLAIMER There will be SPOILERS for this...
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MEGA REWATCH: Mission Impossible II
I was not a fan of Mission Impossible II when it first came out almost 20 years ago. I was about 15, give or take, and I remember hating how the movie had changed gears from clever espionage thriller...
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Triple Scoop Reviews: Captain Marvel, Cast a Deadly Spell, and Bad Times at...
Captain Marvel First Watch or Rewatch: First Watch Amazon, Netflix, Hulu, or Other: Other (Theater) Spoilers: Not really Grade: Chocolate Well, I finally did it; I left my house and got my ass down to...
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